Maybe it’s the ability to cause someone excruciating pain, maybe it’s just the power of intimidation. But there’s something extraordinarily sexy about donning a pair of killer high heels. Even if by a gift of prophecy you knew your ankle is about to be twisted, you’d still take the chance. Maybe. Crazy as this pull seems, there are some funky inventions out there that I might think twice before getting into. Here I’ve taken the liberty of compiling some creative albeit unsettling pumps and heels that might capture yournightmares attention. (Note: Ratings are purely subjective speculations and may vary from individual to individual based on the magnitude of your feet, taste, and common sense)
(Image above via thatisstrange.com)
THE LEOPARDSassy and only a little strange. Definitely do-able.
(Image via howcool.com)
Creative factor: 7/10
Makes me think of Spotty Spice. I wonder why.
Pain Factor: 5/10Shouldn’t be a problem for seasoned stiletto wearers.
Makes me think of Spotty Spice. I wonder why.
Pain Factor: 5/10Shouldn’t be a problem for seasoned stiletto wearers.
THE SLINGSHOT
Somewhere, an angry bird is looking for its launcher.
Somewhere, an angry bird is looking for its launcher.
(Image via weird-fiestal.blogspot.com)
Creative factor: 7.5/10
Somehow yellow just makes everything better.
Pain factor: 6/10Still bearable.
Somehow yellow just makes everything better.
Pain factor: 6/10Still bearable.
THE QUESTION
Isn’t this a cellphone holder?
Isn’t this a cellphone holder?
(Image via mylifeisbrilliant.com)
Creative factor: What am I even looking at?
Pain factor: When I figure out where the foot goes, I’ll let you know.
Pain factor: When I figure out where the foot goes, I’ll let you know.
THE ENGINEERING WONDERLady Gaga would be so proud.
(Image via howcool.com)
Creative factor: 8.5/10
Provided that it isn’t made of real skin.
Pain factor: 20/10Considering you’d have to walk on your hands.
Provided that it isn’t made of real skin.
Pain factor: 20/10Considering you’d have to walk on your hands.
THE FLIPPERSGreat for Tsunami-prone countries.
(Image via foundshit.com)
Creative factor: 8/10
Finally, we ladies can walk out of the sea looking flippant.
Pain factor: 5/10You’ll probably be wearing this on sand anyway.
Finally, we ladies can walk out of the sea looking flippant.
Pain factor: 5/10You’ll probably be wearing this on sand anyway.
THE CURLY WURLYUm…I’m not sure how. Or why.
(Image via white-anemone.blogspot.com)
Creative factor: 9.9/10
Provided that it is even a shoe to begin with.
Pain factor: 6/10Balance factor on the other hand…
Provided that it is even a shoe to begin with.
Pain factor: 6/10Balance factor on the other hand…
THE FLESHERNow, this I think is pretty cool.
(Image via addfunny.com)
Creative factor: 8.5/10
It has the perfect combination of comfort and creepiness.
Pain factor: 5.5/10At least it was made with some thought for the wearer.
It has the perfect combination of comfort and creepiness.
Pain factor: 5.5/10At least it was made with some thought for the wearer.
THE GRIM REAPERThis one is comes with a warning from the Devil himself.
(Image viamywalkinwardrobe.wordpress.com)
Creative factor: 9/10It has a chic goth-quality to it, for sure.
Pain factor: 9/10I can already hear my bunions screaming.
Pain factor: 9/10I can already hear my bunions screaming.
THE POINTEEvery ballerina’s dream come true.
(Image via leatherbus.com)
Creative factor: 7/10
I’ve always wondered how far a pair of heels could lift a foot.
Pain factor: 10/10
Expect no toenails after.
I’ve always wondered how far a pair of heels could lift a foot.
Pain factor: 10/10
Expect no toenails after.
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